All persons have different levels of capacity, maturity, training, skill, and experience. In addition, we have particular family backgrounds, cultures, personalities, idiosyncrasies, tendencies, dominant afflicted emotions, communication styles, and many other characteristics. In short, the combinations and permutations of our karmic formations are truly beyond calculation.
Given all these permutations, the potential for unsuitability between two particular persons is very high. It should come as no surprise, then, that any one relationship between any two persons is fraught with the potential for misunderstandings, conflict, and plain incompatibility. It is indeed the extremely rare relationship that actually ‘works’, so we should not be surprised in the least when most do not. Those are the odds.
When a relationship increases stress or suffering, whether its nature is personal or professional, there is no sense in prolonging it. It is best to move on and release it, without resentment and recrimination. It just does not work.
We just wish all beings happiness and the causes of happiness, and go on our way. It may sound a bit too simple, but that is the way it must be —the only way it can be.
It takes much energy to continue to attempt to figure out ‘why’ or ‘how’ there is conflict between two persons. The ‘why’ is too complex: multiple causes and conditions. The ‘how’ is equally convoluted: incalculable karmic accumulations. And it truly makes no difference. Even if we were able to figure it all out, how would it make things different? Things are just the way they are.
If you are carrying a very heavy burden, what is easier: to set it down, or to continue to haul it around?